Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Why I don't talk about it....

I have been questioned quite a bit lately as to why I do not blog more or talk more about my drinking days and how and what happened to get me here to sobriety.
I understand curiosity. I ask a zillion questions, and not because I am rude, it's because I am teachable. I need to see how others have done A,B,C....no matter what abc are. make sense? I understand the need and desire to hear other people's stories.
The thing is, it's all too raw yet. Too real. Too painful to share. Every time I sit back and think "ok, I can do this today, I can write about what happened when I passed out on the kitchen floor in front of my 2 and 3 yr olds" but the breakdown that happens...I cannot let the thoughts continue. I end up in a very very bad place.
So, slowly, if you stick with me on this journey, I will be writing more, as it gets easier and easier to feel the pain involved with sobriety. The incredible damage I did to my precious girls.....