So, Here we are folks. I am on day "it doesn't even matter, it's been so fucking long" 145 of finding a job with ZERO luck.
It's sad. It's hopeless most days. It's a feeling of utter despair and huge fucking fear. It's knowing that very, very little separates you and your children from being homeless.
Yet, there are these people. these people whom you have NEVER met face to face. These people who feel your struggle, KNOW your pain right down to it's core...people for which I can never say thank you enough. Thank you isn't even a real statement at these times. You know who you are...countless people have prayed, chanted, given suggestions, run with me, send msgs of hope and laughter, shaken chickens, and various other good juju things my way. Some of you have sent me things. Paid for things. Helped me in ways I am not deserving of but incredibly grateful for. You, this page of people have rallied around me, loving me, hoping for me, carrying me when I cannot go on another minute.
In all of this all I can do to repay and say thank you is to live it. What does that mean? That means to honor all of you. To practice what I preach. To be kind to strangers. To go to meetings and stay sober. To pull my head out of my ass and find solutions...even painful ones.
I am grateful....I am honored to know all of you.
Love you guys...